Nights like this

I know better than to stay home all day and not get out and get some sun, because when I do that I get really depressed and lonely. So tonight I am really sad and wishing I had a special someone in my life. Its these times and moments in my life that I really feel alone, yes I have my GF's and they are awesome, but there are times like tonight that I really wish I had someone special to just confide in, snuggle up next to and just know that I'm wanted and cared for. *sighs* I don't understand how someone can go for years without having someone special in their lives. Its so depressing not only physically but emotionally and to ones soul.

I realized tonight that its been months since I was with someone intimately and I'm craving it. No not really craving the sex part, but someone to kiss, hug, hold and confide in. But I also know that I don't want just anyone. I want someone who is going to be there and want to be with me. *sighs*

So tonight my thoughts wander towards to two special men that I felt close to and had really hoped something more would come of it. No not ThePast....but especially one who I miss terribly and wish that things where different between us. It really sucks to miss my friend and wish we could friends again. I miss that.

So tomorrow I'll make sure that I get out in the sun get some natural Vitamin D and hopefully be shaken out of this loneliness.