Sometimes fate throws you a connection with someone that you can’t quite understand. It’s funny because logically I know to not fall for online chemistry, that its really all about the real life experiences. People can be any one they want online, but sometimes just sometimes you seem to have this connection with someone online that you can’t explain away.
You hear all the time about people chatting online and then leaving their spouses or meeting the other person and falling madly in love. My good GF E is a PERFECT example of that. After being married 3 times by the time she was 30, she had meet a guy online and they chatted for close to 2 years before she decided to visit him in Toledo. It was suppose to be a 2 week trip which has turned into close to 3 years now and they were married 6 months after she went out there.
So why am I fighting this chemistry that I am feeling with someone? Is it fear of getting hurt? Is it the fear of being lead down the wrong path again? Have my walls of protection gone up so far that I don’t know how to tear them down? I remember a time when I use to the tell The Past that falling in love or giving someone a chance was worth the fall, that it only hurts when you hit the ground and sometimes you get lucky and have a parachute that guides you to the beauty and safety of the fall. So why can’t I take this own advice and allow myself to fall?
He seems to fit what I am looking for in life not just the normal everyday things the wants of a relationship etc, but the other side of me most people only glimpse but don’t understand, the truth beneath those 6 layers of life.
So why am I so afraid that the parachute will have a hole in it again and smack into the ground? Sometimes you have to just trust the wind and the sail to take you were it leads you.
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