372 and counting

So feeling very very very down on myself last week, my friend T decided he was going to write and ad for me on CL. One to prove a point to take a different approach on dating and the type of ad I place. Two to show that I am still awesome and three well three had to do with the wording of the ad and why he wrote it the way he did.

This is what he wrote:

They said honesty was the best policy so here goes. I'm looking to find a life partner, but I am doing it here on Craigslist, so you gotta be a little different right? Obviously we will start with some dates, and if things go well we will move on to some sex and friendship and marriage and all that good stuff. But first you gotta ask me out. I'm hoping you're between mid-30s and late 40s, and that you're awesome.

The "bad" things about me: I can be clingy at times. I'm liable to replay our dates over and over in my head and may ask you awkward questions about random word choices you made three days ago as though the entire universe depended on that specific choice of words. I expect you to tell me I'm pretty, especially if I am not feeling it myself that day. I'm moody, probably moodier than you're used to. But that means the good moods are stronger too, right? I tend to like everything scheduled. So it can be hard to date me early on. Just because I had Friday open to go on an amazing first date with you doesn't mean you can guaranteed get back on my calendar within two weeks. If things get serious I will damn sure make time for you, but I've got friends and clubs and groups I hang out with and if they're already on the calendar you just have to wait til I'm free. And sometimes my calendar is full because I have TV to watch. Hey, those shows were there for me when you weren't so deal with it. I'm fat. You can call it curvy and BBW and all those things, but some of you would just say fat, and I am. And that isn't changing. So if that counts as "bad" in your eyes, don't bother continuing to the "good" part.

The "good" things about me: I really like sex. A lot. Probably more than you do. In fact this may be a bad thing because it may get annoying how much I want sex. I love giving head and I am really good at it. And I make pretty cool noises when I cum so there's entertainment value there. I'm probably kinkier than you are. But I am happy to teach. I give amazing little presents. I'll randomly bake you cookies for no reason. I'll hand draw little cards with crayons. I'll get out my glue gun and decorate the shit out of household objects and give them to you as gifts. My smile lights up a room. I don't do drugs. I don't have any psycho exes you have to worry about. I'm a really good kisser. I love to cuddle. I have epic tits and I love showing them off. And if you glare at dudes who stare at my chest in the bar I might just blow you in the parking lot as a thank you. I have my own job, my own car. I'm an adult, not some pet you're gonna have to take care of (though I really dig a man who wants to do that). Did I mention I can cum from having my nipples pinched? I didn't? Well you're gonna find out soon enough anyway. I am terribly loyal, and affectionate, and loving, and honest. I will treat you like the king you are. It's the least I can do if you're gonna put up with me. I love to laugh. I love to be happy. I love to show the people I care about how much I love them.

Basically, I'm awesome. You're probably awesome too. If you think your version of awesome and my version of awesome will get along, send me an email with "sunflower" in the subject so I know it isn't spam. Thanks!

 

Now at first I was taken back and went wooooooo nelly hold your horses here. But then he explained his point and 372 emails later I see his side. There have been a handful of men that have been emailing, following up and a few that have asked me out. But here a week later it just seems like they haven’t really shown the effort, that is but one. One that I went out with last week and have a date with Friday. One who calls, who laughs, who texts, who well who shows up.

So let’s see if this approach, this honesty works.