Healthy boundaries

So I have been working on those healthy boundaries in my life for the past few years. I'm able to usually do it pretty easily these days, but those that you think would be the easiest seem to be the hardest. I thought setting boundaries with my mum was hard but lately setting healthy boundaries for yummy and myself has been really difficult.

Yumminess and I are friends! So why do we have this need to meet in private? or kiss, hold each other, etc.? This isn't healthy and makes me feel a bit used. So today we are suppose to see each other and talk, tomorrow we will be having dinner with his daughter, but today is to talk somethings out in person. As email, IM and text is not a healthy way of communicating these things.

Yumminess asked me last night if I could get off work early and I actually thought about it and was excited, but than I started thinking about it and realized that it was really a healthy thing for me financially, mentally or physically. So I decided that I wasn't willing to do that, furthermore that I felt that we should meet in public somewhere, such as Starbucks.

Yumminess wants the pawning, stroking, physical connection when he needs that but emotionally that only confuses me and leaves me feeling used. So if I am going to be there as a friend for him and his daughter I realized I am going to have to be strong and not allow ourselves to be put into those intimate situations. If I don't allow the intimacy than I really can't have any expectations. After all as he has so eloquently reminded me time and time again that I need to accept him for whom he is and that I am not his GF, fiance or wife. These are all true statements and I have realized that I need to protect myself emotionally and this really is the healthiest way I know how to do it.

Why is it those that mean the most seem to hurt you the deepest?