Wednesday, December 20, 2017

Heavy hearted

One of A’s marines killed himself last night.

It’s a surreal feeling to get a text from your BF saying “I’m numb” “ I need to call you”. I knew something bad had happened, so I went to my car. I worried it was him wanting to end things but then I thought something might have happened to his mom or daughter, no it was a best friend. 

How do you deal with that? How do you as a military man fight with other men and women get closer than family and then have to deal with their passing? How do you deal with them killing themselves? How do you as a bystander help those that are left behind? There are always so many questions. So many that you’ll never get the answers to.

A wants to know the why, the details.  He wants to know what drove him to this. I’m sure he’s asking himself what he could have done. It’s normal but knowing from my own experience that you’ll never get the answers you are seeking. You’ll never truly know the why, the pain the person was in to take their own life. You have to mourn and move on.

He’s asked for some space to be alone. As hard as that is I am going to respect that and it’s really hard for me. I want to more than anything go over there and put him in my arms, to just hold him. But he’s not that type of man and he has asked for space so I have to give that. 

All I can do at this time is show him I love him, respect his request and just be here for him when he reaches out. If I don’t I’ll push him away and I defiantly don’t want that. I just pray that he doesn’t push me away.

The thing that people who commit suicide don’t realize is the pain they are causing others that they are leaving behind. They will be out of pain and that is all that matters. 


My heart is so heavy, my thoughts are sad and my eyes are swollen.

No comments:

Post a Comment